*sigh*

Wednesday, January 5, 2011 - Brian had just been transferred to the marine division and was scheduled to have the day off. In the end, however, he had a court case and then stayed at work for a jet ski training class that would never happen. I was at work myself, then came home around lunchtime.

A few hours later I got a call from a good friend. She asked if I had heard from Brian. Those words sent a chill down my spine, as her husband is in law enforcement and we both know that that question can't mean good things. I told her I hadn't and she asked if I'd heard what was happening in Rainier. It was then that I learned that Rainier Police Chief Ralph Painter had been shot and killed in the line of duty.

I admit that I was numb for a while. I talked to her on the phone for a few minutes more and then got off. I sat around for a bit as the news sank in. I tried to give Brian some time, knowing that since he was on duty he was probably there on the scene. I eventually gave in and texted him, just wanting to hear from him that he was alright. He called back a little later to tell me that he was indeed alright physically, though you could tell that emotionally he was not. Brian truly liked and respected Chief Painter and to have to deal with his death was a heartwrenching and horrible thing.


In the end, I was very thankful that Brian was okay, but we were both entirely saddened by the horrific loss of such a wonderful man and public servant. It was a very difficult time for a while. We both came to face with the reality that someday that could be Brian, that his life could be lost in duty and that, despite the quiet county we live in, the life of a cop is a dangerous one.

10 days later I rode with Brian in the procession for Chief Painter. The procession took 20 - 30 minutes to pass and stretched at least 10 or 15 miles long. There were hundreds of officers and fire fighter there to pay their respects to Ralph.

The outpouring of support from people in all the communities we rode through was just awesome. On nearly every sign in every city were messages of rememberance for Chief Painter.
Schoolchildren from across the county came out from class and stood on the roadside in respect. Boy Scouts from Chase's school dressed in their uniforms and formed an honor guard, holding an American flag and standing at attnetion for the length of the whole procession. What got me most were the little kids with their hands over their hearts and the big men in hard hats, holding them over the hearts with tears in their eyes. It was touching to know that Chief Painters sacrifice was appreciated and respected so much in the eyes of the community.

The procession started just outside of Rainier but ended at the University of Portland. Just before entering the University we passed under and American flag strung between two firetruck ladders.

Portland firetrucks were posted along the road, all firefighters standing at attention

and the Patriot Guard, lining both sides of the street with flags.
The memorial was was filled with the solemness of the occasion. Family photos were especially difficult for me, partly because there were pictures of some of his grandkids, who were in my preschool class a few years ago, but also because of his love of Disney and all the happy photos from there. The bagpipes truly tugged at my heartstrings. Hearing them play Amazing Grace broke my heart. But it was the final call out that really got me - when the radio calls out the Chiefs call number, gets no response, calls again, still no response, and then calls out his end of watch. Even now thinking of it brings me to tears. I never want to have to hear the last call out for my own husband.