3 weeks. That's all we have. 3 weeks from today and Brian will be leaving for Academy. And he's gone for such a long time -- 4 months. 4 months is 1/3 of the year. It's his birthday, my birthday, Easter, Mothers Day, Fathers Day and the entire baseball season. It's 4 months of missed goodnight kisses for the kids. It's 4 months of lonliness for me.
Brian and I are such homebodies and we don't really have friends, except Bek and Jenn and their families, but we don't get to see each other often and they don't live nearby. I don't have anybody here in Scappoose that I hang out with. I don't have anyone here I'd even call up and talk to on the phone. I don't have anyone here to lean on when I get fed up and need a break for a while.
Brian and I have always relied on each other. We've always talked to each other. We've always done everything together, from grocery shopping to taking kids to practice to deciding what to eat for dinner. I'm going to miss that when he's gone.
I don't want to be a crybaby about it, really I don't. But it's going to be hard. I feel like I'm going to lose part of myself while he's gone, like a big chunk of my life is missing.
And while I'm trying to enjoy the 3 weeks he has left here, in the back of my head is this date looming over me -- the little black cloud ready to rain on my life.